Feminism

I've never really had to struggle with the concept of Feminism. Growing up I was aware of it, but I never came across any Woman who actually mentioned the word let alone proclaiming to be a Feminist.

I'd always been acutely aware of Man-bashing and Woman-bashing, but it was always something said either in jest or from the pain of a relationship breakdown and were lashing out from frustration. But on the whole, we were equal and we had equal opportunity.

Of course, there was the media articles on topics such as domestic violence and the gender wage gap but 99% of people I knew simply had "jobs" not careers. The wage gap was something that had no real meaning in my lived experience. Most people were on PAYE and nobody was paid extra because of their sex.

Feminism was a construct for posh people to complain about how unfair everything was, whereas us commoners down here in the coal face, just went about the rest of our lives in a happy yet oftentimes struggling existence.

But in our new digital age, access to information is monumentally vast, covering the whole globe and can be viewed instantly from the comfort of our living rooms. A brilliant thing, yet also terrifyingly dangerous.

I'd known from a very young age how tough it was for Fathers estranged from their children. I have plenty of experience of that, it's awful. In fact, this is the first time I've ever written this down. 

To be labelled a deadbeat dad when you're in a damp, freezing flat, sleeping on the floor with no money to even turn on the portable electric heater next to your threadbare mattress is quite a situation to recover from.

I remember that day like it was yesterday. I didn't want to turn to my parents, they were already going through what was a largely amicable divorce. Most of my friends had drifted away, because they were shared friends with my ex and she had asked me not to go to our local pub anymore because she felt it would be like I was "rubbing her face in it" 

It was my decision after all to break up. But the backlash of that was I was left with nobody I could value as a close enough friend to turn to.

So anyway, back to that day. Turned out the only contact I had from that day while I was shivering in my bed trying to get some sleep before the night shift was a text from my daughter

"When are you bringing Mums money round"

That was it.

My relationship with her just gradually slipped downhill from there. And a couple of years later when I had to leave work and claim incapacity benefit for 18 months things finally came to a head.

My now 16 year old daughter was off to college. I hadn't seen her in a while. But then a text message came, I thought it might be something positive, let's build some bridges I hoped. 

But rather than try to build any bridges I immediately found out what they actually wanted was £10 a week.

Now I like to think they were under the impression that I was living some kind of high life and £10 isn't a lot of money, but when you're unemployed with crippling credit card debt, it may as well have been a million pounds.

There's plenty more to that story, but it's old news and not really that relevant to the topic.

So when Fathers 4 justice hit the headlines. I felt their pain. Downtrodden Fathers dressed in super hero outfits just climbing up shit. It was bold and it was beautiful

Of course, it never really effected any real change in social thinking. We are the deadbeat dad generation. Don't fight it, wear the title with pride, I know I do.

So anyway, my financial situation improved dramatically throughout my 40's due mostly to hard work and sound investment I was able to pay off the last of my debts 2 years ago. Let's get back on topic.

Around that time, I became more aware of how Feminism (something I felt was probably just a force for equality between the sexes) had a really nasty, toxic side. The kind of side that makes you nauseous every time you think about it.

Shrieking harpy's like Harriet Harman promising to tear down the patriarchy and usher in a new era of brilliance and equality the likes we have never seen before couldn't really last long could they?  I hoped

Well, actually they can. Harman is still going strong in politics preaching the same old crap into the same old echo chamber.

Does she really think that blaming Men for, well, pretty much everything is going to persuade half the population that Labour, is a good option when it comes to visiting the ballot box? 

Well maybe she does, Labour is still the second largest party in the Country and she still remains an MP

But, Labour hasn't been in power in over a decade. How can a country that has so much to owe to socialism, continue to vote for a bunch of buffoons to lead it. Probably for many reasons, but I suspect rampant feminism and misandry have played a part. Well it has for me anyway. 

I haven't voted Labour in any election this century. They seem to be utterly clueless in deciding what they're for and what they're against. The buffoonery of the Tories is evident every day. But MP's such as Kemi Badenoch will ensure I may never see a Labour government in my lifetime again. And I'm pretty pleased about that.

So anyway, I'm rambling again. 5 years ago, a documentary called "The Red Pill" appeared on my recommended feed. I knew it was made by a Woman and it appeared to be an expose on the Men's rights movement.

"This is bound to be awful" I thought to myself. The last thing I need to be watching is yet another Feminist telling me how bad I am. That all my problems are just imagined and the only way to redeem myself is to throw myself at the altar of Feminism and beg forgiveness for being born with a penis.

I didn't watch it for 6 months. But there it remained on my TV, the black image of this poor falling Woman, helpless to survive the evil that is Men. And the only way to save her was to repent my sins against 3.5 Billion people.

So, like the nosey rubbernecking git I was, I decided to swallow my anger at the thought of  having to self flagellate myself for being responsible for all the Worlds evil towards Women and watch it.

Now, I cant say it was the greatest documentary ever made. There were some convenient cuts to make Feminists look a bit silly which didn't need to be made (They looked silly however you chose to edit) It was pretty low budget and lacked a bit in any real depth of questioning. But it wasn't meant to be that sort of documentary. It was one young Woman's personal journey and the audience was invited along for the ride. It's just the type of documentary I enjoy. The type where interviewee's are just allowed to talk. Simple and very effective.

The director (Cassie Jaye) a self proclaimed Feminist, is what I would call a proper Feminist (as is defined in the dictionary) equal opportunity for both sexes, what a great idea!

She finished the documentary with one simple sentence

"I no longer consider myself a Feminist"

Feminism for her had become a dirty word. She still held her principles and views, but was able to see that Men had it pretty shitty too. her problems aren't because of the mythical devil called patriarchy, her problems are blameless. Life isn't always going to go the way you want. You're not oppressed, you're just being alive.

Her documentary was a genuine appeal for understanding from not just the increasingly toxic side of Feminism, but also to the ever growing hard activists on the Men's side. Surely some common ground can be found?

Well no. Hard line Feminists just doubled down, repeating the same old mantra. Universally delivering a damning verdict on it's qualities and pushing it's director into the position of fully paid up shill.

I can't say I was surprised.

In 2015, another Labour MP Jess Phillips openly laughed at the thought of Men being able to raise their own issues on International Men's Day. And I quote

"I don't care about Men's issues"

This from a serving MP. 

It's probably 1 of the most vile things I've ever heard regarding attitudes towards the plight of Men

But how did the tabloids report it? Well, it was a non-story. The real story was "Men Evil" The Daily Mail twisted it round to make the story all about the rape and death threats made towards her after the video went live. And then she's paraded through the media like a modern day gladiator puffing her chest out and calling herself a Warrior. And everyone lapped it up. Men are just so disgusting.

That's the story. The poor plight of  Women suffocating under the jackboot of  misogyny. So once again, we've spun a 180 because "patriarchy"

It's a beautiful lesson to learn. The only sex that really matters is the Female sex, Men are the disposable sex in every sense.

What worries me, is Jess Phillips had 2 young sons in 2015. How does she transfer that rationale onto such impressionable minds? 

I ignored most of the "metoo" crap, by that time my limit had already been reached. I just didn't care anymore. Women being cat-called? Couldn't give a shit. Had your arse groped on the tube? Not interested. Fed up with Men staring at your Tits? So fucking what?

I didn't hate Women, I just no longer had any interest in what they had to say

It wasn't until the murder of Sarah Everard that I had any interest in the plight of any Woman. That was truly horrific, that broke my heart

The vigil went ahead in spite of lockdown restriction and it touched me in a way I hadn't been affected in a long time. But, of course, yet again it was hijacked by feminists. 

You don't turn up to a vigil with a megaphone. 

They hijacked the harrowing grief of Sarah's family and stomped over all the rational Women in attendance that day, who were innocently marking an event in such an incredibly powerful way. 

That was the point of the vigil. It's silence sent the most spine-chilling roar all round the country. It was deafening & It shook people to their core. Anyone with an ounce of empathy would struggle to hold back their tears (I failed)

And then the feminists turned up, shrieking, chanting like demented harridans demanding action. Armed with their megaphones and camera's looking for any opportunity to film for their own nefarious reasons any kind of Police reaction to the by now full blown protest. 

Oh they got exactly what they wanted. The perfect shot to submit to the media, A poor, poor Lady, wrestled to the ground, but don't forget to pose for the camera! That then became the story and the feminists got the publicity stunt they craved. This was not just Police brutality, this was Male supremacy police brutality and here we are again. Another warrior Woman for the media to fawn over.

How could Men be so disgusting?

All we needed was some video to begin circulating amid chants of "Let her breathe" and the coup d'état would have been complete.

It was the single most disgusting thing I had seen in years

Every tweet on twitter remotely related to any crime committed by Men against Women devolves into the usual rubbish. It's the patriarchy. It's Toxic masculinity. Only Men can fix this. Yes it's ALL Men.

The problem is, it's been "All Men" for 50 years now. I know you're tired & exhausted, but you know what?

So am I. 

Women are pleading for Men to be allies. Sorry but no. You go your way and I'll go mine, just leave me the fuck alone. Unless I see you physically being attacked, I have no interest. I'm sure you're quite capable of telling someone to fuck off by yourself.

I recently had an interview for a part time job. Luckily for me I don't particularly need a job, but this one seemed quite interesting. But the interviewer was a Woman. when I entered her office I asked her who else would be attending the interview

"Just me" she replied

"I'm sorry, I can't do this" I said, and walked out.

There are only 3 Women in my life who I would be comfortable spending any time alone with.

Thankfully. the vast majority of Women aren't feminists. There are countless Women who can see through all that crap. I hope their voices grow stronger. 

Inspiring Women like Suzanne Venker, Lisa Britton, Hannah Wallen to name only a few. 

Erin Pizzey who tackled domestic violence head on. A crusader who could have made an immeasurable difference had she not been hounded out of the country by feminists. The list is long.

Even Women without any kind of platform are taking the stand, pleading to just be allowed to make their own choices and live their lives in peace.

Feminism is a cancer, my beautiful Mother died of cancer. I hate cancer.

I'll finish up by quoting Karen Straughan, a formidable Woman of breath-taking candour who's intelligence and prose needs to be heard.

Feminism: We're here for all

"So then the Men come and say, well, what about us. Oh you Men? Go sit in the corner and stop mansplaining"